Soft Tips for Tough Guys!

Posted: September 12, 2011 in My Articles

We all know the marriage vows that state: “Will you love her/him, comfort her/him, honor and keep her/him, in sickness and in health, for richer, for poorer, for better, for worse, in sadness and in joy, to cherish and continually bestow upon her your heart’s deepest devotion, forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her as long as you both shall live?”

Simple words, please!

Do we even know what these well-said sentences mean in daily life? Here are some tips that I like to call love and marriage ethics that the vows and regulations don’t explain. They are small details, but they matter a lot in a woman’s life.

Sometimes, guys treat their girls as their buddies…they treat them the way they treat other “guys”! And they think since it’s ok with the guys, it’s also ok with the girls! Well…that’s where all the problems start!

You’re not a cool guy nor a tough “manly” man if you don’t know what annoys girls…Living peacefully with your wife/fiancé starts by avoiding the things that drive women up the wall!

So here goes….

*Do you have a good sense of humor? If you’re involved in a relationship, think again before you crack a joke in the presence of your wife or fiancé. Studies have shown that women get annoyed by male-natured jokes. Women tend to be very aggressive when they are the butt of the joke. They seem not to get it, but actually they do get it quite well…that’s why they get upset.

*”We’re going out diving…we’re having some friends for dinner”…Well.. .. these are things you used to do when you were “alone” but not anymore. Making any decision that involves your partner must involve them too…Don’t make decisions without consulting her. It’s just rude and annoying to invite someone home or decide to go on a trip without talking to the person who lives with you in the same house!

*She hates the guts of your best friend…and it hurts so badly…”Why can’t she see him the way I do? How can she hate someone who is that wonderful?” you wonder. Well…she has her own heart, you know, which is separate from yours. Just because she’s in love with you, it doesn’t mean that she must fall in love with your friends, your pajamas, or your mobile…you can still keep your friend of course…but make sure to keep the two away because, eventually, you are going to lose one of them…don’t impose your friends on your wife or fiancé.

*A very stupid and traditional idea about couples is the idea of having to make the same order at a restaurant. Think about it…if you like shrimps, for instance, but she doesn’t, does that make of her a bad mate? It’s just a matter of taste…you two are not twins living in the same womb! Who said you have to eat the same thing?

*Don’t share her secrets with anyone! Don’t share her silly laughs, her bad moments…the way she looks in the morning…her strange habits….this is simply not your area ..not part of your possessions…Danger zone!…don’t go there unless you want to lose her trust forever!

*To some men, their fiancés or wives are celebrities; they have nothing to talk about except them! When they are with their friends or family members the wife/fiancé is always the best and hottest topic! Sorry to disappoint you guys, but this is also out of your domain…no signal…get it?

*Do you want to kill your gal without being charged of any crime? Just praise other women in front of her, especially at the beginning of your marriage/relation…I don’t mean other women like your mother or your sisters (although it might fall under the danger zone for some girls)…I mean …you know what i mean…you do it all the time guys, and it just kills girls even if some of them don’t express it. According to girls’ book of love, this is betrayal! Igniting your wife’s/fiancé’s jealousy really sucks! It simply turns your loving, caring girl into a cold, careless person…or worse; it might turn her into a wild cat that attacks everybody including you!

One last tip: If your wife is acting cold or crazy, it doesn’t always mean she’s “PMSing”…it might be something you did! Think about what you’ve done before blaming her madness on hormones!

These are just basic tips for you guys out there…the rest is left to your intelligence and charm!

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Comments
  1. James Pallet says:

    What about the guys, do you not think that they experience pain and hurt too, or are you too far removed to the female side t remember we were all born an innoncent baby in this life, and that are highs and lows, our wants and our needs are simple too. We too as men are sensetive creatures

    • Maha Noor Elahi says:

      @James Pallet
      I totally agree with you…but I am a woman and I speak for women…I express how most women feel…….and if I were a man, I would express things from a male’s perspective …unfortunately, most men don’t know or don’t like to express their feelings..

      Thank you 🙂

  2. aseft says:

    lol pmsing …do women act crazy in those times?

  3. B. Willson says:

    Those were thoughtful comments that many males can appreciate, especially if starting out in a relationship. Paying attention to each other’s needs and putting them first is what good relationships are all about. Peace and happiness be with you. B. Wilson (a male reader)

  4. Mamdooh alradadi says:

    Great work and insight on things I know now, but failed then. The friend thing is true but should be worked out, you can’t just seperate your best friend for life from your new life and wife you know.. Other than that you rock with wonderful insightful article and guide for tough men 🙂 keep it up!

    • Maha Noor Elahi says:

      Thank you so much, Mamdooh for your comment. I agree with you regarding the friend issue, but to work this problem out, it takes very mature couples, which is not the case in a lot of marriages. May be being diplomatic about it might work …plus I said somethings are left for the man’s intelligence & charm 🙂

      I really appreciate your valuable feedback.

  5. faisalasaad says:

    Hi again Maha, You have now inspired me to write the opposite version of this piece, once I do I will make it my proper response to this.

    I truly enjoyed it, in my early days, reading this article would have either been a treasure of guidelines or I will look at it and think she can’t be right that’s too much to do! But as we age God grants us wisdom and experiences and we come to see and understand… when the element of Love is inserted into the equation, the most difficult things in life becomes an easy joy, sacrifice becomes an gift, and hurting that you love is like stabbing a dagger into your own heart. But again that’s only my perception of Love, and I do not reflect the views of men but only myself.

    Thanks for the joyful read.

  6. faisalasaad says:

    Hi again Maha, You have now inspired me to write the opposite version of this piece, once I do I will make it my follow up to this 🙂

    I truly enjoyed it, in my early days, reading this article would have either been a treasure of guidelines or I will look at it and think she can’t be right that’s too much to do! But as we age God grants us wisdom and experiences and we come to see and understand… when the element of Love is inserted into the equation, the most difficult things in life becomes an easy joy, sacrifice becomes an gift, and hurting that you love is like stabbing a dagger into your own heart. But again that’s only my perception of Love, and I do not reflect the views of men but only myself.

    Thanks for the joyful read.

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